Dear Readers

The theme of this blog, Abigail coming home, has been completed for some time now. Therefore, it's time to close the book on this adventure and call it complete.

The family adventure, however is far from over. If you wish to continue to follow the Friend family, head on over to our family blog at thefriendfam.blogspot.com. There you will find updates on Abigail as well as the rest of the family.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Gotcha Day

We have our daughter.

It's a little difficult to describe the situation, but I'll give it my best.

We met her on a street corner. Not in some nice fancy hotel lobby or an appropriate room in a government building, but on the street outside the locked up Civil Affairs office. The Civil Affairs official was ten minutes late, so four families met their kiddos on the street. It's a good thing it wasn't too cold.

We walked to the office from the Bell Tower Hotel, where we are staying, a walk of about 6 or 7 blocks. As Jane (our coordinator) searched for the proper gate or door to use in the absolutely enormous government building, Mrs. Wang, one of the orphanage workers, recognized us coming. Abigail stood there quietly, clinging to Mrs. Wang as Jane and Mrs. Wang conversed in Chinese. She refused to come to us or even look at us. Mrs. Wang said that she was all excited about it yesterday. Today it's anything but excitement.

A few other families also stood around, waiting for the official. When he arrived and unlocked the door, that's when the screaming began in earnest. Orphanage workers handed the scared kids over to the families so they could do the paperwork, nearly everyone was milling around taking pictures, and the room was way too small to hold everyone. Abigail had tears welling up in her eyes also as both Mrs. Wang and the orphanage director encouraged her to come to us. I managed to place her on my lap long enough to snap a picture but I could tell she was not a bit comfortable with it.

After all the paperwork was signed (we'll actually do most of it tomorrow) and it was time to leave, Abigail began to wail loudly. She stopped when Jane came out and clung to Jane as we walked back to the hotel. Jane spent a good deal of time coaxing her to hold my hand and she finally did so.

We reached the hotel with sort of a hand holding truce in place. I'll hold Baba's (Dad's) hand as long as I know Jane is still right there.

We chatted in the hotel room for a while, trying to distract Abigail long enough for Jane to leave. She waved off anything that was offered her, and was generally silent and sullen.

When Jane finally left the wailing began anew. She calmed down after several minutes and just stared straight ahead. I got out a package of index cards, and wrote her English name on one, saying it to her and pointing to her. I then wrote out the rest of our names, one by one, saying them and pointing to the appropriate person. I went back through the cards saying the names but not pointing. She stood still but her dark eyes moved, glancing at the named person. I then held cards at random, not saying anything and not pointing. Her eyes moved to the appropriate person.

Thinking that she may want do draw something, I handed the pack of cards and the pen to her. To my surprise, she accepted them and hastily scrawled three Chinese characters. She looked at me and pointed at her self. Her name.

Progress, I think.

Since we had not eaten any supper, David and I went to the McDonald's across the street to get some take out food. (Actually ORDERING the food is another story.) Deb stayed behind to get Abigail ready for bed. She refused to change out of the outfit she was in and it was a test of wills to get her to brush her teeth.

When she laid down on the couch, she was instantaneously asleep. I'm sure it was a tiring day for her as it has been for us.

It's been a very long wait, and we finally have our daughter. For that, we are thankful. It's something we have hoped for, prayed for, waited for, planned for, and traveled halfway around the world for. Things are finally coming together.

In all other respects, Gotcha Day is one of those days you would rather be done with.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Just wanted to know how much you are all in our prayers. "So do not fear, for I am with you, do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10 This is our prayer for you-that God would surround you with peace, strength and love.

Anonymous said...

We are praising God you are all together safely! We will pray that God will comfort Abigail, as this must be terrifying. And for strength and patience for the rest of you, as well as confidence of God's presence. You are the first reflections of God's love she has seen! We will pray that her heart will be drawn to the Light in each of you....

Julie D. said...

Praying for your family. Sorry that "Gotcha Day" didn't go as you were "hoping", but pray that everyday will go just a liitle bit smoother.

Anonymous said...

I have been reading along with you on your trip to bring home Abigail. My prayers are with you so far and now in your next days with Abigail.

Anonymous said...

We are praying for you all! Sitting in church this morning I was excited to think that when you get back to the front row, we will have one more 'friend' to love!

shanda said...

Tim and Deb
We are praying for you!! Hopefully your day today was much better. Looking forward to seeing you and meeting Abigail in Guangshou.

Gary, Shanda, and Simon Sprick

The Franz Family said...

Huge progress. She is a smart girl. She understood what you were trying to do. There three Chinese characters are her name in Chinese. It is natural for her to be scared. She will soon realize that she has just joined a wonderful family!